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Economy / Featured News / Mongolia News / Others / April 1, 2016

Red is the new green

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As part of the green initiative, the Mongolian government has decided to issue a new legislation banning the consumption of all vegetables and fruits. The prime minister has elaborated that the ban extends to “essentially anything that is categorised as plants. The new embargo will be a big boost to the economy, as expenses on costly plant foods fall, income per capita will increase, leaving more money to be invested in the domestic market. It’s a new era for Mongolia, an era of initiative and innovation.”

The policy was pushed to realisation by the environmentalist/anti-racism movement called the ‘colourblinds’, with their new campaign “red is green!”. The aim is to raise awareness about the cruelty and civic irresponsibility of consuming fruits and vegetables (i.e plants), where the colour red is used to represent meat and green to represent plants. One advocate explains that eating plant based food items contribute to deforestation and soil degradation on a global scale due to the manufacturing and farming methods involved. He also went on to say: “murder! cold-blooded murder!”. The DubiousDaily has assumed it to be reinforcing their core message about the cruelty inflicted on plants, especially as most plants remain alive at the moment of consumption.

The new embargo will be a big boost to the economy, as expenses on costly plant foods fall, income per capita will increase, leaving more money to be invested in the domestic market. It’s a new era for Mongolia, an era of initiative and innovation.

The colourblinds’ claim that plant consumption is a drawback to sustainable growth as it’s a detriment to the environment. Mr. Hipey Pothed, a research expert hired by the Mongolian government is in charge of analysing data on the relationship between plant  consumption and co2 emissions within Mongolia. He concludes that as the total mass of plants consumed per capita increases, co2 emissions per capita also increase (chart shown below).

Screen Shot 2016-03-29 at 3.54.20 PM

Despite criticism from analysts around the world, he remains confident in his findings, considering the hard work and time of 1 complete hours devoted to the project.

Dr. Mahchin Omnom (Phd at St. Canibal’s college) supports Mr. Pothed’s findings, although Dr. Omnom acknowledges the fact that eating meat normally results in greater quantity of greenhouse gases emitted, especially methane. Nevertheless, seeing as the Mongolian population prefer to have a ratio of 3 to 1 meat and vegetables in their daily meals, the more plants they consume the more meat they will also have to consume in order to compensate for the increase in fibre in their system. The phenomenon has been systematically observed at Dr. Omnom’s household. “I can hence deduce that the eradication of plant consumption will result in a significant reduction in greenhouse gas emissions as meat consumption will return to the status quo. The remaining plants let to live and prosper will produce oxygen as a gesture of gratitude to the Mongolian people, creating a cleaner atmosphere for Mongolia.”- Mr. Omnom.

I can hence deduce that the eradication of plant consumption will result in a significant reduction in greenhouse gas emissions as meat consumption will return to the status quo. The remaining plants let to live and prosper will produce oxygen as a gesture of gratitude to the Mongolian people, creating a cleaner atmosphere for Mongolia.

Legislators say that Mongolian citizens’ opinion on the matter have not been taken into consideration, but they speculate that most will be in favour of the newly carnivorous diet in Mongolia.  Intelligence suggests that there’s an internal belief in parliament that once the policy is made, Mongolia will be set back on the track back to the glory days or Chinggis Khan, as at that time they only had meat for meals. Mr. Prime Minister confirms nor denies the suspicion.

The ‘colour blinds’ have declared a further ambition of appealing for rights of plants once the policy is implemented. They express that by definition plants a living creatures, and must thus enjoy certain rights. The lobby for plant’s rights are beginning to take shape as the ban on plant consumption proceeds.

SOURCE: M.A.D. April's Fool




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